Control

I really don’t like to ask for a spanking, but as my need intensifies I do. The spanking submission ritual is greatly enhanced if C controls it from beginning to end. In part, it is C’s control I crave as well as the bonding rush that follows. The control actually extends beyond the spanking. I don’t think C recognizes this yet, but I do.

I have read comments by other bloggers in F/M discipline relationships that spanking solves problems, clears the air and provides benefits to the wife in the form of a well behaved, obedient and helpful husband. I have always been skeptical of such claims.

In particular, in our relationship, “problems” are basically contrived to provide a foil for a ritual spanking. C would never use a spanking to solve a real relationship problem (at least I don’t think she would at this point in time, although I would probably submit to that). Consequently, the benefit of a well behaved, obedient and helpful husband should not necessarily be the result of C spanking me. However, I have noted that my recent spankings may be the cause that has produced that very effect.

I’ll give an example. I received a mind blowing spanking on Friday, almost two weeks ago. I basked in the glow of it all weekend which was fortunate because there was no glow from the sun. It rained all weekend. As a result of the rain, I couldn’t cut the grass (which didn’t hurt my feelings at all). However, about the middle of the week C said, “You know, it’s supposed to rain again this coming weekend. Do you think you should cut the grass after work tomorrow?” As I have mentioned in the past, C loves to look out at a freshly mowed lawn. Now, normally the last thing I would want to do is cut the grass after work, and since the days are getting shorter, I would have to spend two evenings after work to get it done. But, I did it. It surprised me, but I did it with the complete knowledge that I was cutting the grass to curry C’s pleasure and as a result of her control vis-à-vis the spanking she had given me the previous Friday.

It took Thursday and Friday evening to cut all the grass. After cutting the grass Friday, I came in and cooked dinner, and because C was busy with something she was interested in I told her I would clean up the kitchen as well. C often helps with that or does it herself on the grounds that she wants me to exercise on the treadmill after dinner.

The next morning we were lying in bed and C was having her coffee and reading the paper. C said, “I’m sorry I was such a slug last night.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you cut the grass, cooked dinner, and cleaned up the kitchen, and I did nothing. I feel guilty.”

“Don’t. I like to do things for you. I like to submit to your desires, and I like it that you allow me to demonstrate my submission by spanking me. That’s why you got your grass cut during the week.”

“You’re too sweet to spank,” said C, patting me on the bottom.

Well, I keep trying, but what am I going to do. I still don’t think C fully gets it. I started back on my diet and exercise program this week because I know C wants me to. I had lost twenty pounds earlier in the year, but have gained ten pounds back (should have gotten a spanking for that!). I’m beginning to love and even need her control, and she seems to be oblivious to it. Perhaps in a few months I’ll look better in my punishment panties.

Photo: from Naughty_Husband Yahoo Group